AHHHH ha ha ha.
pies in the face seem like something you should do to people like her. not your boyfriend, and not to someone on their birthday. come on people! if you just throw pies at everyone pie in the face loses all meaning!
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Monday, January 26, 2009
Hmm, good question. I would be pissed if someone made me a nice dinner and right before we sat down to eat, they smushed a pie in my face. I guess this proves it--I'm not a gay man!
No, but seriously. Something's up with the pies.
THIS makes me wish that I was a gay man. Why didn't I throw a pie in that woman's face? Hilarious!
No, but seriously. Something's up with the pies.
THIS makes me wish that I was a gay man. Why didn't I throw a pie in that woman's face? Hilarious!
milk
hey, so i was just thinking about the movie Milk. what was with all the pies in the face? does that mean something significant? did something go over my head?
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Sunday, January 11, 2009
TV is AWESOME.
well i'm back in toronto. i'm house sitting. they have cable! right now i'm watching the Golden Globs red carpet stupidness. I LOVE IT. they're talking to tom cruise, robert downey jr, and sting. weirdos. seriously. weirdos. oh. this is all so uncomfortable.
Monday, January 5, 2009
mute
Ramona! how am i supposed to compete with your pretty writing? i can't do it! i want to hear all about your trip IN PERSON. i can't wait. too bad your trip had to take place for the entire time that i was in edmonton.
speaking of which i'm having some serious departure anxiety. i thought this shit was supposed to get easier.
and. went to big rock brewery today. got free beer! the fun begins.
speaking of which i'm having some serious departure anxiety. i thought this shit was supposed to get easier.
and. went to big rock brewery today. got free beer! the fun begins.
Saturday, January 3, 2009
Um...it's windy here.
I can't write about my class until it's over, but I have much more to say about the tedious details of travelling. Yay!
Through a series of unfortunate events--i.e. I got lost--I ended up back at my hotel at 8 pm, starving. I was seated in the smallest, darkest corner of the already tiny lounge of the hotel restaurant. Women dining alone are not permitted an entire table to themselves, as I have discovered. I was cheered by the arrival of my brut, which was charmingly served not in a flute but a classic coupe. The glass was tinted with that lovely dusky grey that you find in antique markets. My utensils were gently placed upon marble stones--a long thin slab for my spoon and knife and a small round piece for the tongs of my fork.
Upon the arrival of my single scallop, my champagne coupe became much less attractive. In fact, it looked downright tawdry trying so hard to distract me from the pitiful plate in front of me. It took me a scant 15 seconds to finish my "meal". The accompaniments: A long thin intestine-like coil of butternut squash foam, which separated the scallop from the scallop mousse--a gelatinous mound that resisted my fork for a good while until I was finally able to break it, quite like a stale pudding. The taste was a muted sweet rot. It was not warm or cold, but room temperature. And this foam business. Who enjoys tepid food-flavoured foam? Who? It was all very upsetting. Defeated, I slumped back to my room and spent at least an hour trying to order food online.
Oh, and the name of the restaurant? L2O. I should have known.
Highlight of my day, which will be of particular interest to my good friend Jennifer Baker: Lynda Barry does a fantastic skid! Of a slightly different flavour than our beloved Alberta skid, but equally hilarious!
Through a series of unfortunate events--i.e. I got lost--I ended up back at my hotel at 8 pm, starving. I was seated in the smallest, darkest corner of the already tiny lounge of the hotel restaurant. Women dining alone are not permitted an entire table to themselves, as I have discovered. I was cheered by the arrival of my brut, which was charmingly served not in a flute but a classic coupe. The glass was tinted with that lovely dusky grey that you find in antique markets. My utensils were gently placed upon marble stones--a long thin slab for my spoon and knife and a small round piece for the tongs of my fork.
Upon the arrival of my single scallop, my champagne coupe became much less attractive. In fact, it looked downright tawdry trying so hard to distract me from the pitiful plate in front of me. It took me a scant 15 seconds to finish my "meal". The accompaniments: A long thin intestine-like coil of butternut squash foam, which separated the scallop from the scallop mousse--a gelatinous mound that resisted my fork for a good while until I was finally able to break it, quite like a stale pudding. The taste was a muted sweet rot. It was not warm or cold, but room temperature. And this foam business. Who enjoys tepid food-flavoured foam? Who? It was all very upsetting. Defeated, I slumped back to my room and spent at least an hour trying to order food online.
Oh, and the name of the restaurant? L2O. I should have known.
Highlight of my day, which will be of particular interest to my good friend Jennifer Baker: Lynda Barry does a fantastic skid! Of a slightly different flavour than our beloved Alberta skid, but equally hilarious!
Friday, January 2, 2009
Chicago
I'm quite pleased that--with the exception of one muddled hour--I have managed to flit about this city of random diagonal streets with relative ease. Dining alone in a strange city is much more intimidating than I anticipated. J thinks it's romantic, but really, it's humbling; you become grateful for your friends. Chicago is similar to NY in terms of eating and shopping options, as well as architecture, but the streets are wider and emptier, and it's more "ordinary people"--I think because it's cold. You see the puffers and the scarves. On the airplane, I received a "Mr. and Mrs. T." mix to accompany my vodka. No Clamato. It was putrid. In fact, the flight was very interesting for reasons other than the American beverage options. My favourite Skymall offerings:
1. A metal alloy compact taste enhancer--it replicates the aging process in wine. The advertisement encourages you to bring it to restaurants. Imagine pulling out your wine ager when your friend orders an inferior young wine!
2. The safest pet nail clipper--"takes the trauma out of trimming your pet's nails". A built-in sensor distinguishes between nail tissue and the quick. Can be used on birds! $79.95 U.S.
3. The bug vacuum--Sends the insect through a one-way valve--don't worry, it won't come back out!--to an electric grid.
4. The ultrasonic eyeglass cleaner--it's a large tank that you place your glasses into, which uses 42 Hz of ultrasonic sound waves to remove dirt and dust paritcles. It includes, inexplicably, a basket, watch stand, and CD rack.
Apparently, I still can't get over the sheer entertainment of my flight.
Right now, I am sitting at the desk in my hotel room feeling very small. Only 35 of the 300 rooms in this building are available for guests. The rest are rented out as apartments. So my room is apartment-size, complete with a bedroom, living room, kitchen, dining room, two bathrooms, and two TVs. It's very quiet.
1. A metal alloy compact taste enhancer--it replicates the aging process in wine. The advertisement encourages you to bring it to restaurants. Imagine pulling out your wine ager when your friend orders an inferior young wine!
2. The safest pet nail clipper--"takes the trauma out of trimming your pet's nails". A built-in sensor distinguishes between nail tissue and the quick. Can be used on birds! $79.95 U.S.
3. The bug vacuum--Sends the insect through a one-way valve--don't worry, it won't come back out!--to an electric grid.
4. The ultrasonic eyeglass cleaner--it's a large tank that you place your glasses into, which uses 42 Hz of ultrasonic sound waves to remove dirt and dust paritcles. It includes, inexplicably, a basket, watch stand, and CD rack.
Apparently, I still can't get over the sheer entertainment of my flight.
Right now, I am sitting at the desk in my hotel room feeling very small. Only 35 of the 300 rooms in this building are available for guests. The rest are rented out as apartments. So my room is apartment-size, complete with a bedroom, living room, kitchen, dining room, two bathrooms, and two TVs. It's very quiet.
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